I struggle daily with choosing between what I need to do and what I should do, between the urgent and best. I have a feeling I’m not alone in this. What do you do when you feel like life—or others—are controlling you and you aren’t doing what your heart desires? Thankfully, there is an answer in Scripture.

Jesus had some very dear friends who were siblings from Bethany: Mary, Martha, and Lazarus. Bethany is only a couple of miles from Jerusalem, so their home was a frequent stop for Jesus. Imagine all that needed to be done to make Jesus feel loved and welcomed? Martha certainly could! She was the doer in the family, and Mary was a little more laid back. When Jesus came to visit, Martha was consumed with what was urgent rather than what was best.

While Martha was in the kitchen preparing to serve Jesus, Mary was enjoying Jesus’ company. Can you imagine Martha’s frustration? I don’t know exactly what Martha was thinking, but based on her words to Jesus, I’d say she was not thrilled! Maybe she was thinking, If Mary would help, I could sit at the feet of Jesus too! Finally, after one trip too many to the kitchen, Martha blurted out something she probably wished she could take back. Her words showed she had allowed the urgent to take control of the best. She said to Jesus, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!” (Luke 10:40). Oh dear! Martha not only questioned Jesus’ concern for her, she was consumed with the urgent and told Jesus what to do!

I love Jesus’ reply. “Martha, Martha,” he said. (Maybe He had to say her name twice to get her to slow down long enough to gain her attention). He didn’t say, “Martha, stop serving me!” No, he said, “Why are you worried and upset about so many things?” Jesus wanted her to focus on enjoying Him instead making everything perfect.

Can you relate to Martha? Can you imagine Jesus sitting in your kitchen while you are busy cooking and you fail to speak to Him? We often find ourselves so busy we don’t take time to sit at His feet in prayer. We allow the urgent to take over the best.

Several years ago my view of prayer was challenged as I wrestled with what I really believe about prayer. Do I truly believe I’m entering into the presence of God when I pray? If so, would it be difficult to slow down to communicate with Him?

Have you ever gotten frustrated while waiting on God? Have you ever tried to tell Him make suggestions about what He should do? When we allow what’s urgent to take over our daily lives, we may find our prayer lives consumed with telling Jesus what to do to rather than enjoying Him. And when there is not an immediate response, we may find ourselves asking, “Jesus, don’t you care?”

Before we become frustrated and begin telling Jesus what to do, we need to slow down and see if He is waiting for us to sit at His feet and talk to Him. Jesus is very clear: being with Him is far more important than serving Him. Slowing down to focus on Him will allow us to discern what is best over and what is urgent.

Additional Resources

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